Manipulation
Influence in which the other person doesn't know what they are agreeing to.
How it shows up
A request that can’t be refused without guilt. Information presented so that it leads to one conclusion. Manipulation isn’t always deliberate — often it is the only way of influencing others that someone ever had.
What we do with it in therapy
The measure isn’t the intention but the outcome: if after a conversation you regularly doubt yourself and don’t know how you agreed, that is information. We work on recognising the feeling and on a reply that neither attacks nor gives way.
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See also
Trauma
Not the event itself but the trace it leaves — when an experience exceeds the capacity to process it and stays in the body as the present.
Neuroplasticity
The brain's capacity to change through experience — the reason therapy can work at all.
Need
What you are actually looking for beneath a complaint, anger or withdrawal.
