Triangulation
Bringing in a third person to relieve tension between two — most often a child.
How it shows up
A mother complains about the father to the child. The parents don’t argue directly but through questions about parenting. The tension drops for a moment, and the cost is that a third person carries what isn’t theirs.
What we do with it in therapy
We take the child out of the role of go-between and return the tension where it arose. That is uncomfortable for the parents and a relief for the child.
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See also
Chronic stress
A state of permanent readiness in which the body never quite switches the alarm off.
Insight
The moment you understand something about yourself anew — the beginning of change, not the change itself.
Post-traumatic stress disorder
Persistent responses after a traumatic event: re-experiencing, avoidance, hyperarousal and altered mood.
