Infidelity
A breach of the agreement about exclusivity, which destroys the foundation of predictability in a relationship.
How it shows up
The pain isn’t only in the act but in the lying around it — in the fact that you thought you knew where you stood. That is why recovery doesn’t depend on the details of the event but on whether transparency can be rebuilt.
What we do with it in therapy
The work has three steps: stopping, understanding the context, and deciding about the future. Forgiving too quickly and endless questioning are equally common traps.
See also
See also
Polyvagal theory
A model describing three states of the nervous system: safe connection, mobilisation and freeze.
Consequences instead of punishment
A response that is connected to the act and known in advance — not an expression of an adult's anger.
Codependency
A relationship in which your own worth is measured by how much you care for someone else.
