Needs table
A list of your needs and who you expect to meet them — it often reveals too much weight on one person.
What it’s for
Many people expect everything from a partner: closeness, conversation, fun, opinions, support at work. No relationship can carry that, and disappointment is guaranteed.
How it goes
- List eight needs: conversation, touch, quiet, laughter, advice, practical help, shared activity, recognition.
- Beside each, write who you expect it from.
- Count how many times the same person appears.
- For two of the needs, find another address.
See also
Monthly review
A short meeting with yourself, looking a month back and one step forward.
Holiday plan
An agreement about holidays after a separation, made in advance — a period that reliably sharpens conflict.
Digital break plan
An agreement with yourself about when the phone is away — held up by external supports, not willpower.
