Shame after a mistake: why one error eats up a whole month
The mistake was fixed within an hour, yet weeks later you are still thinking about it. What separates guilt from shame, why the thoughts keep circling and how to return a mistake…
ReadEmotions
Anger, shame, guilt, sadness - what they tell us and what they are for. Posts on recognising, naming and regulating emotions.
Crying at work: why we fear it so much and what it really means
One tear in a meeting and the feeling you have revealed too much. What tears actually do, why the workplace handles them so badly and how to respond when someone else cries.
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Anger at work: the one emotion you're not allowed to show
Anger at work isn't losing control, it's information. Why we swallow it, where it goes when unspoken, why we read it differently in women, and how to say it so it's heard.
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Redundancies, crises and moral distress: the weight of decisions that hurt others
When a decision is justified and still hurts. What moral distress is, when it becomes moral injury, and how to carry decisions that affect people without going numb or punishing yourself.
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Countertransference outside the therapy room: what your feelings tell you about others
Why are you drained after coffee with a friend, and why does that one colleague make you so angry? Everyday countertransference, emotional contagion and a three-column exercise. The last post in the…
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When others keep you in guilt: recognising emotional blackmail
Hurt feelings, martyrdom, silence, love made conditional — recognise the pattern? How emotional blackmail (FOG) works, and how to respond without giving in or going to war.
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How to apologise and how to forgive — yourself included
Why does "sorry" so often fall flat? We look at the five ingredients of a real apology and at what forgiveness actually is — including when you owe it to yourself.
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Mother's guilt: why the most devoted mothers are the ones who feel they do too little
The most devoted mothers feel the most guilt. Why a child needs an imperfect mother, what research says about time with children, and where the way out is.
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Survivor guilt: when it hurts because you were the one spared
You kept your job, your health, your life — others didn't. And instead of gratitude you feel guilt. Where survivor guilt comes from, and how it can be worked through.
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Guilt and shame are not the same — and the difference matters
"I did something bad" or "I am bad"? That small difference in focus decides whether a mistake moves you towards people or away from them.
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