How to choose a therapist who is right for you
How do you find a therapist who is right for you? What to check, what to ask at the introductory session, which red flags to take seriously, and when to switch.
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In-depth writing on psychotherapy, emotions and relationships — clear to read, grounded in the profession.
Disorganised attachment: when the same person is both comfort and fear
The most complicated and most misused idea in attachment theory. What fright without solution means, where it comes from and why online tests do not measure it.
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Egg freezing: a decision that is hard to make alone
Behind egg freezing there is often not a career but a relationship that isn't there. What research shows, why the decision feels so lonely and how to approach it.
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Secure attachment can be learned: what the research says about earned security in adulthood
Earned security does not mean you have repaired the past, but that you have gained access to it. What the long-term studies show and where the concept is weak.
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Losing your faith, or the community that used to hold you
People, rituals, meaning and part of your identity can leave along with faith. On a loss others do not see, on tension in the family, and on the reverse journey: conversion.
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Resistance in therapy: when part of you doesn't want change, and why that's normal
Coming late, forgetting, joking at the crucial moment? Resistance is not sabotage, it is information. Learn its disguises and what to do with it.
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How to recognise your attachment style: questions that tell you more than an online test
An online test gives you one word. Questions about real events give you something you can work with - and show that the pattern is not the same in every relationship.
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Avoidant attachment: why closeness tires and retreat calms
From outside it looks like coldness; inside it sounds like tiredness. What the partner sees, what is really happening, and why the body tells another story.
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Trauma after abuse: what remains and how it heals
When the danger is over, the body often doesn't know it yet. What remains after an abusive relationship in the body, memory and relationships — and what research says about healing.
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Why therapy sometimes hurts before it helps
Feeling worse after a session and wondering whether therapy works at all? Why it hurts first, where the line between processing and overwhelm runs, and what helps.
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